MOBY DICK, OR "THEN IT FELL APART" BY MOBY

“Then it Fell Apart” is Moby’s second autobiography, mostly dealing with his fame from “Play,” as well as flashbacks to his childhood. The book is full of see-through self-deprecation, name-dropping (The Trumps, Hillary Clinton, Jon Bon Jovi, David Bowie, Putin’s daughter), and probably exaggerated tales of sex and drug/alcohol abuse (Natalie Portman went public and disputed his account of their relationship), reminding me of every “I’ve got a girlfriend in Canada. She’s a lingerie model” story that geek in study hall regaled me with.

This is actually the Dean from that Community show, but you get the picture

And that’s a shame, because Moby is a better writer than expected, especially when recalling growing up poor with a single mom and a revolving cast of creepy hippie stepfathers. There’s a passage where he practices how to stand and act before going to a high school party hoping his weird poor vibes don’t give him away that most nerds will recognize. Poor nerds will recognize his joy in finding the one cool item in the Salvation Army that would be worn again and again. He can also pull off a witty sentence now and then, like, “Also, I’d been a blackout drunk then. Which, to be fair, I still was now.”

There’s more sex and drug/alcohol abuse than you’d expect, even though Moby tries to make it seem like he’s above such sordidness, which nevertheless, takes up huge portions of the book.

And maybe that’s the problem. Unlike classic rock stars, Moby tries to paint himself as self-aware and a “nice guy” who just can’t seem to stay sober or monogamous. It’s almost these sexy women’s fault for making it so easy for him. This distancing effect leads to lots of eye-rolling passages, like him trying to discuss Tolstoy and Dostoyevsky with Russian models. Of course the jaded Eurotrash aren’t as deep as him and are only interested in drugs and sex, as opposed to Moby who is interested in drugs and sex, but only because he’s lonely and misunderstood.

Moby tries to describe the ennui of the jaded rockstar, especially in a chapter when he describes owning multiple properties he’s never been to or is even really interested in visiting. Joe Walsh covered this much better in 1978’s “Life’s Been Good,” which was 8 minutes long, instead of 400 pages.

With Queen Padme calling him a big ol’ liar, and a few glaring mistakes (nobody called it “moshing”in 1983. It was skanking or slamming), it’s hard to tell how much of his debauchery is totally made up.  But to Moby’s credit, made up or not, he's able to tell a compelling (if kinda same-y and suspect) story, so it's a pretty entertaining read.

Drugs/Sex/Bad Behavior  - 8/10     Not knowing much about the guy other than veganism and Push, I was surprised how high this score is. Hard to say how much is true, which knocks it down a number or two.

Opens in media res - Yep.

Namedropping  -  10/10   

Percentage Ghostwritten  - tough to say. I would imagine a ghostwriter would have advised against including made up Star Wars romances, so let's say 30 percent. 

Buy, Borrow from the Library, or Pass - It's definitely entertaining, but I couldn't see buying it unless you had an AA/Recovery shelf in your home library. Borrow it.